WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Kevin McCarthy is “quite frankly amazed” by a “newfangled invention” called the tape recorder, the House Minority Leader told reporters.

“It’s the darnedest gizmo,” he said. “You speak into it, and then it can play your voice back, clear as day. I can’t for the life of me figure out how it works.”

“It almost seems like witchcraft,” he added.

McCarthy said that the invention of tape-recording technology could have a “major impact” on politics.

“When you say something to someone, now you’re going to have to remind yourself, Hey, Kevin, the things you say might wind up being recorded,” he said. “It really is a game changer.”

The sudden emergence of the tape recorder raises concerns about how other technologies might someday affect politicians’ conduct, McCarthy said. “I know this sounds crazy, but, if somebody figures out how to put a camera into a phone, look out,” he warned.

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